Vision

When I served as a full-time missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, my mission president had a theme that he shared with the missionaries often: vision. He told the story of a young family stuck in a snowstorm. The wife and child remained in the car while the husband went out to look for help, but it was hard to see anything through the blizzard. Hours later, the man was discovered dead, and the woman and child were found safe in the car. Those who found the man realized that when he had gone out searching for help, he had walked in circles. Without being able to see where he was going, he hadn't been able to make a straight path to get help.

As devastating as that story is, it provides a powerful example of how necessary it is to have vision in our lives, whether it be for our education, our careers, or our marriages. In Proverbs 29:18 in the Old Testament, it says that "where there is no vision, the people perish." My husband and I have often discussed the vision we have for our marriage and for our family. For example, before we were married we decided that the word "divorce" would never come up, no matter what. We decided that we wanted to go on a date every week. We decided that we wanted to make our religion and the Lord a major part of our lives. Those decisions have had an inexplicable impact on our marriage.

So what is your vision? What kind of a marriage do you want to have? Regardless of how your marriage is now, you and your spouse can create a vision and take steps to reach it. But first you need to know how to create a vision. I will share with you the vision my husband and I have for our marriage and our family to give you an idea of what yours could look like. Then we can refer back to it while we go through the steps of making a vision.

Vision: Celestial Kingdom

1. Strategy: Continue to Nourish our Testimonies
• Tactic: Daily personal and companionship prayer and scripture study
• Tactic: Weekly church attendance
• Tactic: Monthly temple attendance
2. Strategy: Utilize the Atonement of Jesus Christ
• Tactic: Take the sacrament each week
• Tactic: Daily repentance
3. Strategy: Strengthen our Family
• Tactic: Hold Family Home Evening each week
• Tactic: Engage in wholesome family activities

Vision

The vision is the big picture. In this example, the vision is to reach the Celestial Kingdom—that's another term for heaven. So think big! What is it that you and your spouse want to achieve together? If you are having a hard time coming up with something, I suggest you pray about it together. When I first got to the mission field, my mission president invited me to create a vision for myself. Over the next couple of days, I prayed to know what the Lord would have me set as my vision. He told me something very specific, and I felt His Spirit throughout my entire soul. It was an incredibly sacred moment for me, which is why I will not share details here. But with the continued guidance of the Spirit, I was able to think of strategies and tactics that would lead me to that divinely given vision. And I know that you and your spouse can have a similar experience and find out what you should be striving for.

Strategy

Once you know what you want your vision to be, you need to come up with a few strategies. A strategy is a milestone on the path that leads to your vision. In the example, the strategies are to continue to nourish our testimonies, utilize the Atonement of Jesus Christ, and strengthen our family. Notice that these strategies are still high-level and are not incredibly specific.

Tactic

Now it's time to get down to the nitty-gritty details. A tactic is a smaller checkpoint to help you know how you are progressing toward your vision. These are the day-to-day actions that, over time, will help you accomplish your strategies. In the example, in order to strengthen our family, we hold something called Family Home Evening every week. This is a time to learn more together about God and the scriptures. We also like to do fun things together, like play games, go bowling, and go out for ice cream. Can you see how these tactics can help us strengthen our family?

I hope this example helps you as you contemplate what your ultimate goal as a couple is. You and your spouse are on a sacred journey together, and it will be really hard to get there if neither of you knows where you are trying to go or if you both think you're headed for different locations. Obviously, the example I provided is very religious, but yours doesn't have to be. Your vision can be as general or as specific as you want, as long as you can come up with strategies and tactics to support it. Here are some ideas you can draw from:

• Be unified
• Harmonious marriage
• Have more fun together
• Serve each other more
• Build a foundation of trust
• Better communication
• Learn a new skill or hobby together
• Improve quality time

The options are endless. Choose something that both you and your spouse feel is important. I think this is especially useful if you are struggling with a specific aspect of your marriage and would like to strengthen that area. If you feel lost, uncertain, or hopeless, don't keep walking around in circles. Figure out where you and your spouse want to go, and use that goal as your point of reference. We can all keep our marriages from perishing if we have vision.